Aohrodite Wounded - Support for Women sexually assaulted by male partners and educational resources for professionals
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This animal will jump up and eat you
~ Sinead O'Connor ~
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Survivor's Name:


Survivor's Story: I want to share my story. This is basically of the outline of abuse I went through.

*At age 5 I was sexually abused by a teenage neighbour. He would attempt intercourse with me, penetration with fingers, and oral rape. He would say if you don't let me put it inside you, you'll have to let me put it in your mouth.

*At ages 11-13 my stepfather would sometimes parade around naked, and attempt to get me involved in sexual behavior with him. I ran away at 13 and reported him- luckily he was arrested and found guilty.

*At age 15 a "friend" found out I was sexually promiscuous (I had two sex partners). He started grabbing me, and pretty much overpowering me. He shoved me into a room, and pushed me onto a bed and shoved his fingers inside me. Luckily a parent was home and yelled out for us to stop fooling around. I felt really confused I had said no repeatedly throughout the night but I didn't get to say no when he pushed me onto the bed- so I felt bad. When he stopped he went and got his friends. He tried to show off in front of them by shoving my head into his lap for oral sex. When I refused he kneed me in the face-his friends found that to be hilarious and a real turn-on.

* At age 15, a 30 year old man developed a stalkerish crush on me. He followed me incessantly claiming to love, and want me, and claiming he could tell I was lonely and abused. His affections quickly turned to pressuring for sex then threats of rape, and getting hurt If I didn't do it. When he convinced me to have sex with him, "or else", he mentioned my no meant nothing anyways to him, and he was going to take what ever he wanted- I guess as a warning if I felt like saying no again.

*My family would beat me and call me a whore because of the last two incidences (I guess because they felt I could've avoided it). My mother decided it was necessary to do this when I showed a high school guidance counselor I had been self harming. For punishment she got my brother to punch and kick me, and said they were doing this because I was crazy. The abuse and neglect, continued heavily throughout my teens.

* A college acquaintance holds me down on a couch refusing to hear me say no. He pulls my pants off and kneels on my thighs as I try to cross my legs. He stops moments away from penetrating me, when I began yelling "get the fuck off of me." At another time he pushes me into sex refusing to wear a condom eventhough I begged him to. Luckily I got him to stop. When I met someone else soon after him, he called me a whore and said he thought I cared about him ( I can't say he reciprocated the same for me).

*At age 27 my partner drugged and raped me with the help of another friend. I was repeatedly raped and sodomized one night by both of them. While I was drugged I was aware I was being raped but I could not scream or move.

There are more things- like major self esteem issues, self harm problems, suicidal tendencies, and mental health issues that I think were caused by abuse.
Submitted November 21 , 2010 5 : 59 am

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