Aohrodite Wounded - Support for Women sexually assaulted by male partners and educational resources for professionals
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My womb is not a football for you
~ Sinead O'Connor ~
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Survivor's Story: It was a perfect summer night when it happened. It still seems so surreal. I was at my boyfriends house and we had the house to ourselves and we where in the hot tub. We where just kissing and joking around nothing serious(I wanted to wait till the right time to get serious)and then he tried to untie my top while we where kissing and I smiled but took his hands away. Then he tried to untie my bottoms and I took his hands and gave him a look (the no means no look) He said okay he was sorry and we continued to kiss.

Then out of no where, he was holding my hands one second and the next second he had thrown my hands against the side of the hot tub and ripped off my bottoms. I froze it was like I couldn't understand what was happening because how could it happen to me? Fortunately I snapped out of it I was screaming and crying and I started hitting him but he just grabbed both my arms in one hand and hit me in the face. I could feel blood coming out of my nose. I could feel him pushing himself into me it hurt so much but I was able to break out of his hands and I punched him in his face. He backed off and touched the blood on his face and looked at me with this look that just chilled me to the bone he was so angry.

I got out of the hot tub, grabbed my towel and ran. While I was running I was trying to think of where I could go, my friend Kayla lived 3 blocks away, I was too scared to look back out of fear he would be right behind me. I got to Kayla's house, my feet where bleeding from stepping on glass and my nose was still bleeding. She took me inside her house and tried to figure out what was wrong but I couldn't talk, I wouldn't I felt so ashamed, I thought it was my fault.

The next day I told Kayla's older sister what had happened and she helped me come to the realization that it was not my fault and I needed to go to the police. But even to this day, when there is time where I'm not really doing anything I think about it and sometimes doubt myself. But I know deep down inside that I was a victim, it wasn't my fault but I survived, I'm still here aren't I?
Submitted November 21 , 2010 3 : 42 am

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