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Survivor's Name:


Survivor's Story: I am 14 now but I always find myself having flashbacks of this memory:

When I was little(from the ages of 4 & 7) my mother had a serious relationship with her boyfriend. To everyone he was perfect. lets call him "B". My mom loved , my grandparents loved him , hell the whole family did. But in my eyes he wasn't a bit of perfect.

My grandparents had a huge house so we lived their along with my aunt and my younger cousin.He knew my mothers work schedule so he would come when my mother was at work and when my grandparents werent around. He would come in my room and pck me up and throw me up in the air playfully. I was a kid so I loved this. Then he would give me a big kiss and tell me that he loved me like a daughter. My father wasn't around so this meant alot to me. Then he would sit on my bed and tell me to sit on his lap so we could play a game. I listened and sat on his lap. Then he would fixate me so i was sitting towards him so i our genitals were in direct contact. Then he said " this is the horse game" and he would tell me to gallop like a "horsie".

Although I didn't want to he would get angry and promise me toys if I did it. So of course , i did it. I was so naive and stupid. The i trot on him like a horsie " little did I know he was dry humping me. He would forcefully try to push himself inside of me and take my clothes off. But luckily i wasnt that stupid. I often tried to stop him. But i was wayy to weak. The pain was often unbearable even though he wasnt "inside" of me. I remeber just being sore. When my mom asked about it, I just made excuses. My mother never suspected anything. I shouldve spoken up. I still havent told her. The only people I told my story to was my best friend and whoever is reading this.

Luckily , when I was eight y/o my mom and him broke up. He was a really good friend of the family since him and his mom knew my mom since she was 15 y/o. He came over my grandparents house recently but he didn't force himself on me or anything. he just gave this "look" I don't know what it means but i know that it didn't sit right with me. I don't know if what I realized is rape or what , I just felt the need to share the story.

Thanks for reading my story.
Submitted July 27 , 2011 3 : 59 am

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