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WHAT'S ON THIS PAGE?![]() Introduction | Your Pain is Real | What You'll Find Here | Cautionary Notes
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"Men who abuse and rape their partners are men who seek to control others. In being abusive, they are not out of control; rather, they establish control "
~ Carol J. Adams ~
Although relationship rape is a form of domestic violence, information about partner rape itself has been limited., Yet partner rape, according to studies, is the most common and most ignored type of rape.. Rape by somebody you have been sexually intimate with is often not seen as 'real' rape. Society takes the dangerously limited view that 'real' rape happens in alleyways or parks, the rapist is a lunatic stranger, and the victim must be a virgin of impeccable reputation. Such attitudes are based on the premise that having given initial consent, a woman is not free to withdraw it. This makes wives and girlfriends 'unrapeable', and also permits sexual violence against them to continue.It is true that there are laws in most western countries which make rape in relationships a crime, but because of underlying attitudes about what is real rape, they are often ineffective.
Sometimes women raped by partners are themselves unable to name their experiences at the hands of partners as rape. When they can call it rape, they are often aware that there will be little validation for them, and this can make finding healing resources difficult. People can also tend to make negative and wrong inferences about a woman's intelligence or character if she stayed in the relationships - such people rarely understand the dynamics of violent relationships.
But partner rape is real rape.
It may happen once or many times.
It may involve coercive pressure or battery and torture.
It happens in very violent relationships, or in those that are otherwise respectful.
Women are raped by men they love. People who might find this site helpful are: Survivors of rape in marriage Teen survivors of rape by boyfriends Women raped by live-in partners or non-live in partners Women raped by men with whom they had been having affairs. Women raped by men who were ex any of the above Survivors who are seeking to understand their experiences many years later Any person who cares for survivors and is interested in knowing more about partner rape and its effects.
Click the banner below to go to a thriving and supportive community for survivors of sexual assault.
This isn't a substitute for professional care, but is a terrific way of getting you some extra support from other survivors - many of whom are survivors of marital/partner rape. The board also has a safely-moderated chatroom I am also a moderator there :)
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